The scriptures paint of beautiful picture of Jesus’ humanity. And there is one scripture that speaks to me like no other. It’s the one where Jesus is in the Garden of Gethsemene the night before his death.
We tend to picture Jesus as being so holy and so divine - rightfully so I must add - but we tend to forget Jesus’ human side. While Jesus is the true Son of God, He is also fully human. Which means he had real emotions just like you and me. He had friends that he loved even outside of the Apostles.
On the night before his death he explains to the apostles that his heart is troubled and sought companionship from the closest of the twelve apostles. But they are so sleepy that they can’t stay awake with Him. And He asks them to “remain here and watch.” I get the picture that he didn’t really want conversation at that time. I think he just desperately just wanted not to be alone on that night. Nevertheless, while Jesus was in agonizing prayer, his closet companions couldn’t stay awake. He asks, “Could you not watch one hour?”
That one question gets to me. Loneliness is a terrible, agonizing place to be. Jesus know’s what’s coming and he doesn’t run away from his purpose. It saddens me though, to think of how despite how torturous his death was to come, his last peaceful night on earth was also one field with such agony. How the one thing that he desperately wanted to the point of need, companionship, was not there.
I’m sure if the apostles knew what was to come, they would have reacted much differently. But still, it breaks my heart every time.